Someone pee’d on the family tree

An “interesting” website called MarryYourPet bills themselves as the “pet & people wedding specialists”. I’m immediately getting a flashback of Janeane Garofalo’s Truth about Cats & Dogs sage wisdom of, “It’s ok to love your pet, just don’t love your pet.”

So you’ve found your partner for life, the only thing is – he’s an animal. Not just that he leaves hair in the bath and has abominable table manners, but that he really is an animal, e.g. with feathers, scales or whatnot.

No matter. What’s important is that you’re happy, not their facial hair or how many legs he’s got. So go on, if you really love him and you’re in this for life, isn’t it time you married your pet?

Oh, dear lord.

Wedding packages range from $20-$200. You can also get a marriage certificate, t-shirt, and wall plaque. Apparently there are several satisfied customers. Still not sure? Here’s answers to the vexing questions of why marry your pet, how to know if “he’s the one for me”, and how to propose.

Ready to tie the knot? Just remember…

Although we are happy to marry you, we cannot guarantee that you will happy. MarryYourPet is in no way responsible for anything nasty occurring. If your marriage breaks down or you can no longer stand their smelly breath, it’s entirely your own problem.

Oh, dear lord, indeed.

9 thoughts on “Someone pee’d on the family tree”

  1. How does the juvenile saying go? Oh yeah: “If you love it so much, why don’t you marry it?”
    I guess these folks took that a little too seriously.

  2. Oh, come on, Merrin. You don’t fool me. I fully expect that you’ve already signed up for a full blown wedding for you and Rigley. I’m on to you.

  3. Whatever, Kevin. You just don’t understand the very special relationship I have with my dog. Besides, I love my pet, but I don’t love my pet…. 😉

  4. Aside from the obvious questions about those who would participate in this (taste, sanity, sexual habits)…if you marry your pet, where do you register? Are you allowed to complain if their many siblings are always over at your house, going to the bathroom in the yard and drinking out of the toilet? I mean I just broke my husband’s brothers of that recently and it was no fun let me tell you.

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